A precious woman reached out to me and took the risk of sharing her heart and her art with me. I was so touched by her beautiful and poignant words I had to share them with you. So this blog is written by Stephanie Marek.
You saw me through a broken lens.
Its surface clouded and cracked. Vital pieces missing.
The reflection looking back was distorted and incomplete. In a chance encounter we met. You proceeded to project your agenda upon me. I was the one to make you whole, to make you complete. You caught my attention with your gentleman-like charm as you offered a warm, outstretched hand. You held all the promise of romance, adventure, and protection. Blindly, I followed. You led innocence to a point of no return. Slowly to my dismay, your shine began to fade, and the true tarnish of your heart revealed itself.
Your promise of romance became a reality of selfish needs, loneliness, and a sense of abandonment.
Your promise of adventure became a reality of experiencing life that set your soul free, not mine.
Your promise of protection became a reality of self-preserving lies, deceit, and emotional turmoil.
Under your burdensome shadow, there was nothing left of me. I was imprisoned in a soulless shell, shackled to your ugly, false truth. The once bright light in my eyes had burned out. A once strong pulse had steadily slowed to the point of near death.
A gentle soul tormented. An identity truly lost.
Faced with this disheartened reality, the veil over my eyes began to lift. I no longer recognized the man before me, as the once warm hand turned cold and into something no longer human. In desperate attempts to find the truth and light, your chains got heavier and your grip squeezed tighter. I screamed and yelled. I pleaded for mercy and you lashed out. Vile words spewed from your mouth and rained down like acid, searing the deepest part of me. Your talons tore at my skin, leaving me bloodied, bruised, and forever scarred. An emotional warfare began to battle inside me, and I knew I needed to find a way to break these chains.
To break free from your slander. Break free from your insecurities. Break free from your strongholds. Break free to save my life.
And so the bravest thing I did was run.
Uprooting myself from a life I had built in a place I once thought safe and secure, I sought a new refuge. Exhausted from my incessant disobedience and unable to carry the weight of my choices, I fell to my knees. With fists clenched tight, emotions of hate, rage, and despair rose up inside as hot tears streamed down my face. A wail of unbearable suffering escaped from my body, and I shattered.
Amidst this darkness, the crippled pieces slowly came together to build a new self. My empty eyes began to flicker with hope of a new future. My hollowed heart began to beat with a pulse for a new life. My silenced soul began to breathe for a new purpose and a new voice.
A soft yet piercing light started to surround me. Awakening the senses, my lungs burned with the stench of sulfur, as my ears filled with the sounds of hissing and cursing and the eerie echo of rattling chains. My heart was gripped with fear. I turned and there you were; a creature, now confined to your own self-inflicted prison. I had turned back for nearly too long, my heart pitying you and almost forgetting what you stole from me.
Then a fatherly voice called my name.
I looked to the light that had embraced me, and there He stood.
With an outstretched hand and tender eyes fixed upon me, He spoke my name again. I hesitated, but was not afraid. My soul was drawn to Him, and I realized He was the truth my heart had been yearning for. I stepped forward into His presence and took His gentle hand. I was overcome with a feeling of pure love and a sense of true peace unlike any I had ever known. I was amazed as I watched the scars you left fade, as if I had never been touched by this world. The scratchy, ill fitting, sweat drenched, blood stained rags I clothed myself with were no more. In their place I was adorned with a pearlescent, white robe that fit me perfectly. Undeservingly, joy found my spirit and as tears filled my eyes I knew then, He was leading innocence home.
